In order to avoid problems when it comes time to paying the tab, make sure that you annoint someone as "The Check Enforcer." Their job will be to make sure everyone pays their fair share.
THE LAST SUPPER (PT. 2) - How To Survive Your Bachelor Party Dinner
OK – So, you’ve chosen the restaurant and ironed out all of the details in regards to reserving your date and time. You’ve paid any up-front money that you might need to deposit. You’ve taken careful notes and made sure to get the manager’s signature verifying everything that the both of you have agreed upon. Good.
Now, here in part two of our conversation on the subject of planning the bachelor party meal, we’re going to talk about what needs to be done in the days leading up to the party, as well as what should happen when everybody arrives at the restaurant. If you take a deep breath and follow these directions, you should come out the other end relatively unscathed.
BEFORE THE PARTY
The invitation. I will go into invitations a little more in-depth with another article, but specific to the dinner that you’ve planned, make sure it includes the following information:
• Date
• Time
• Place (with the address)
• Short list of menu items and a price range.
• Amount everyone will donate to split the bachelor’s check.
• Price for valet
• Your email address to contact for questions.
Let’s take a look at each of these items and give a little more detail for each one.
1. Date – Kind of goes without saying, doesn’t it? You can’t expect anyone to show up if they don’t know what day that darn thing’s on, right?
2. Time – See #1.
3. Place – I’m a big fan of including a small map with directions from the major freeways surrounding the restaurant. Is it absolutely necessary, here in our world of Google and MapQuest? Nope, not at all. But, it’s a little extra touch that adds a lot of ease for your guests.
4. Short list of menu items and a price range. As I spoke about in my previous article, there will be a wide cross section of guests with varied budgets for what that they can afford. If you include examples of what is on the menu, along with what they are priced, your guests will be able to prepare and bring the appropriate amount of money for the evening. If your invitation is in email form, then including a link to the restaurant’s menu is advised. Forewarned is forearmed – as the saying goes.
5. Amount everyone will donate to split the bachelor’s check. It’s my overarching philosophy that the bachelor should feel, as much as possible, like a king for the entire night. His every whim and desire (within reason – and the law – of course) should be catered to – and then some. As part of this, your guest of honor should not have to pay for his own meal – and you shouldn’t be stuck with the bill yourself, either. Divide a generous amount (don’t underestimate), which you’ve allocated for his dinner (along with his share of the limo, the strip club, etc.), by the number of guests invited and put it into the invitation. There’s no reason one person (namely you) should be expected to pay for his entire share, and everyone should be receptive to this.
6. Price for the valet. As I mentioned in my previous article, this is an expense that many guests forget to factor into the price for the night. As long as they know up front, they’ll bring along enough to pay for it – along with a few extra dollar bills to tip the guy.
Oh, and by the way – if everyone meets at the restaurant and then takes a limo to the strip club – make sure that they will be able to get access to their cars at the end of the night. The last thing you want is to return from a night of fun and debauchery to find your car locked up in a garage with no way to get it out. That would be – to put it in the simplest of terms – bad.
7. Your email address. Try to resist the impulse to put your phone number on the invitation. If you’re anything like me, you’re busy and really don’t need everybody calling with inane questions every day up until the party. With emails, you can answer them at your own convenience – and not theirs.
DAY OF THE PARTY
Get there 30 minutes early. There’s going to be a lot for you to prepare before everyone gets arrives. Not only that, but you also want to instill a bit of confidence in the manager about you. They want to make sure that there is a responsible and strong person with whom they can deal with, someone who is going to take charge over the group and make the decisions for the night. When you arrive, find the manager and let them know (if you haven’t met them already) that you are the organizer and that you will be the person they will be dealing with.
The table that your group will be sitting at should already be prepared and waiting. Let them know if anything is out of place or not as you agreed. If anything is wrong, make sure they understand that your group will be arriving shortly, that you are on a strict time schedule, and that this is absolutely not acceptable. Hopefully, this will “motivate” them to get off their butts and get everything ready.
Greet everyone. If there are guests you have never met, make sure that you introduce yourself to them. Also, let them know that if they have any questions or need anything – you are the guy to talk to.
AFTER DINNER
The check. After everyone is finished with their meals, the bill will probably come in one check with 15% to 18% gratuity already included. That’s when you do something drastic – you hand it to somebody else. Not just anybody, but somebody that you trust to be tenacious and firm that you’ve chosen WELL before the day of the party. Their job will be to be the “Check Enforcer” and their one job will be to strong-arm, humiliate, and cajole everyone into paying their share (and part of the groom’s) of the meal. The reason I don’t recommend doing it yourself is because it forces you to take focus off of the bachelor and his immediate needs. Instead, you will delegate the task to your “Check Enforcer” and it will be their job to be the tough guy. Also, make sure that this is the only thing you ask him to do for the night. It’s a pain in the ass and he should get some sort of reward for it. Buy him a drink at the strip club. Or, maybe throw down some money for a lap dance. Trust me, he’ll deserve it.
IN CONCLUSION
Well, there you go. I know that it’s a lot to remember and do, but if you follow through with all the details, it should be an immense help and actually make things easier and less chaotic. Just make sure that you are up front with the restaurant that it’s a bachelor party that you’re planning and that you get any agreements in writing. When everything goes smoothly and as planned, you’ll be glad that you took the time and effort to make sure the condemned’s last meal is something he’ll remember for the rest of his life. Well – the rest of his single life, that is.
